He pulled me in the corridor around the corner, I would not go back stubborn. I stood a large marble columns shadow cast by the edge of tears on in his eyes, soak my contact lenses. He stubbornly Banguo my body, large palm tightly clasp my shoulder. I nutation see the shadow on the ground as the dividing line, and I in the dark, he was out. I then looked up the doom of choked tears - he stood under the dim lighting, facial lines and always demanding. He finally spoke, thin lips, one of a room, I heard the voice of fragmentation time, how many light years across it, so difficult arrival of my ear.
"Summer fuel, break up!"
His voice cold, like the trial judge read the book, smooth, but the weight of my breath, I feel like a death sentence in general, so do not blame the tears streaming down.
I like the burst of piercing cold in the wake, tears blurred his eyes, my eyes are dark, my hands groping the bedside phone, a strong light so I can not open eyes, I slightly squinting to screen - May 24, 2011, 01:07.
The quiet summer night, I dreamed I Yu white period of painful past, then the real show in my mind, I pain is difficult to breathe.
My name is summer fuel, summer summer, burning fuel. This name is my mother's emotional work, but also the memories she left me except for outside of the heritage. I was born in Chengdu, one late summer evening, the sun burning, burning to ashes. Then I crumpled in this cozy and comfortable city to issue minimal crying, my mother could not bear, or is not willing to hold me, she was certain that his birth to a monster - dark complexion, eyes closed , wrinkled curled like a little old man. Forgive me again with wrinkled when I describe the word, I always hear from the adults on such an adjective only. It was August 24, 1988, the day I was born, late summer evening.
My mother passed away 5 years old, committed suicide. I remember her bloody red white, then bright colors, shocking. Many years later I can not imagine how she cut their arteries start, shining fruit knife, cut very thorough. How desperate she is?
Her memory is not weak, I remember her preference for white, like dessert. Shallow smile, a village than they should be pretty glamorous aunt, she did not make it beautiful, the audience's soul. Of course, then I do not understand, "the audience's soul" thing children, Lee forgotten that word is said.
Lee forgot my childhood, we are not lovers, is the man child. Forgot to say, I was born in rural areas, and Lee forgot to live in a large yard. We live in the West main entrance, Lee forgotten at home in the northeast corner. I was born, Lee forgotten in the yard playing with mud, he heard screaming called my grandmother: "girl, a girl." And then climbed into the Pidianpidian Lianpao with my family, watching my father My arms, slurred speech, said: "ugly."
At this point, Lee forgotten little behind so I have a valet, I always followed him and told him, A forgotten brother. He would touch my head and said: "Ranran good." You can say this - I forgot to follow Lee mixed big.
The test ended, our family moved into the city. I went to high school in the city. Then, I met that man can not get his life - Yu white.
Yu white is my first love, first love, then if not crush, I think, and Yu white is my first love, I told myself so many times. My first love was his, his first kiss, first night was his first knock down a child is his.
High and one of the opening ceremony, he let me be late themselves. Clean boy, I think.
"A few classes?" I ventured to ask him.
"Seven to." His gaze swept away, and did not look at me.
"We have a class."
"Thank you." He stood behind me and the boys went to the pile.
I learned later, when he was seven to find a position in which, just as flies do not generally chaotic strings. Then I heard I asked him a few classes, and he thought I was to help him too! He has no idea, I simply asked him a few classes only.
It was late summer 2002, August 31, the day we met.
Started between us is starting from a piece of paper, one that I read, "Please do not go after school." Paper. It was an English class, I sat in the first row of the classroom, Yu white in the last row, which changed hands seven sheets of paper passed through his hands. - How long the section of the road ah!Yao Granny "Gee" to recover from the sight of me, staring at the hands of the shoes to see her grandmother: "is the great granddaughter to do it? You look, have a baby, Gan Mafei toss, sneaking their first second child? "
"A boy the family line. Jiazu previous generations on behalf of the students in the baby, how to turn my son had a daughter? Also how the future heir? Say that a married daughter spilled water, so go, at home, not to be broken incense? "said one grandmother of each, it will severely tie the hands of the needle down. At that time, I understand she will never love me. I can not expect her to teach me leaning on my arm to walk, and even more things, I rely on his courage to take the first step. So I went forward, but fell heavily.
This led to two muffled sound of the old lady's attention. Grandma's eyes are always cold.
"You see! The child actually did not throw so much fallen cry! I reflected on her future certainly stronger than men! Land grandmother, whatever the outcome, you Qufu, after all, is your granddaughter."
"After all, girls, and boys can not be compared." Boss unwilling grandmother sitting on the ground floor before I pull up, beat me the dirt hard. Her lips were almost about to paste my ears, the old lady to say Yao is clearly the ring in my ears, "she is not socially recognized children. Zhuade Jin family planning now, so just let the child and I live together. Fortunately, Hong Lu has a pregnant, soon have to come to me stay away from trouble. And if this is a boy, I intend to sent her to the orphanage. home did not afford three children. "
Perhaps that day, the house floating light fragrance, grandmother wearing a violet fine grid Mianshan. Baby on the color and flavor is extremely sensitive. So, I always hated the smell of sweet-scented osmanthus, violet, and wear clothes of the people.
Dean's Office within the conversation continues, but I have no feelings of excitement and tension at first. I was not socially recognized children ah, who would willing to adopt?
"She usually quiet this afternoon, like it? I mean, when I came, I saw her sitting very far away from the children's place, a person wearing headphones reading occasionally fiddle around a large cluster of red flowers. "I turned from the sink exposed in words and eyes I come to an incredible conclusion: she might enjoy me, enjoy my quiet.
Lisa nuns and himself to answer her first, I really feel a bit desperate.
"That red flowers called impatiens, is five years old when her own species, we give her seeds, she will be in the impatiens petals fully open season all-wise, and then select the best red stray, on the small bowl broken, the juice with painted nails Impatiens her body up and down the most prominent place is that ten orange-red nails. "
"But she is not enchanting girl." President in time for Lisa's voice added a sentence.
"Yes, she did not demon, in addition to nails, the other things she is very simple and elegant, just like you see today, she is absolutely quiet girl. To see the day of the book, listening to a day of music, or writing stories a day She wrote an article taken out great, I have here a collection of one, never mind after you see is from a hand-year-old children. "Lisa from his pocket a folded paper neatly and carefully started.
I peered curiously, Lisa would like to know what exactly a collection of my article.
"" Even if the body is not good. "A very sad subject." Shen Lu read it after the title, quiet look. It was not hurried visit, I can see her eyes move slowly and carefully, and even read out, "'If my past life is the cat, I also choose to hit the oncoming bike, even lame, at least, the cat Mom would look at me, then keep in mind that this large group of children behind her, there is my cat only lame, limping. "This article really is the year-old child to write? difficult confidence and she is very good. "
"But precisely embodies her extreme lack of love, so Shen President, if you finally decide to adopt her, please her to love her sensitive to distinguish what is true and what is false." President of porting her tea, water vapor in hazy look Lucy Shen observed, as if doing the final confirmation.
留言列表
